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The Secret, Fear of success..


Recently I've tweeted to want to have another, yes another 4 digit increment. My first was when I stepped out of my comfort zone from Hewlett Packard to Deutsche Bank. What is salary to you? To many, it's a means to anything and everything, after all, money can buy just about anything.

Salary: It's your self worth.

That is what salary is, to me.

So why am I gloating yet again?

Here's something I really wish to share because I know it does happen, to everyone, The Secret

"The Secret posits that the law of attraction is a natural law which determines the complete order of the universe and of our personal lives through the process of "like attracts like". The author claims that as we think and feel, a corresponding frequency is sent out into the universe that attracts back to us events and circumstances on that same frequency. For example, if you think angry thoughts and feel angry, it is claimed that you will attract back events and circumstances that cause you to feel more anger. Conversely, if you think and feel positively, you will attract back positive events and circumstances. Proponents of the law claim that desirable outcomes such as health, wealth, and happiness can be attracted simply by changing one's thoughts and feelings. For example, some people believe that using the Secret can cure cancer"


It's exact as it states, if you believe it enough, it will happen, it's our mere thought process. I've done it relatively easily under strained conditions, during my competitive sports / cybergames days. How it comes is that you have to let your thoughts MANIFEST, which is really really tough, hence I'm only able to perform during stressed scenarios, where the adrenaline and my competitive streak overpowers my subconscious and that "moment" occur.

The same goes for negative thoughts, hence a negative person ends up quite sadly, as what Jan, would simply put, "Sadded Life".

The past 2-2.5years, I haven't been planning any shit, not stressing myself, only trying to ensure I'm happy. I didn't give any free fucks to anyone, explained to my folks how life's with me is going to be like, respect it and I will be responsible for it, things have went smoothly, not epic highs, but not much bumps along the way.

I did Korea with the people I dreamed going with, except for Ms Fun-sized who, had duties to protect his fellow Americans, as well as her allies, couldn't join us. My room was done to perfection, exactly as I wanted it to be, from racks to couch to my tvs and stereos.

Hence off, I wish to add to the above "Law", you do not need to be under certain stressed or strained conditions to let your thoughts Manifest. Being happy, your thoughts are manifesting exponentially, happiness itself, holds endless powers.

So please stay happy and refuse to give free fucks around.


Then i have this problem, FEAR.
My life has been relatively great up till when i turn 21, dad was jobless, owing so much debts, I was serving the national service, struggling for cash, for academics, flunk the same paper 3 times. All that was part or in the plan was lost, basically I lost all the advantage I've garnered and my bet, failed.

Now things have taken a 360 turn around, I'm not that use to success anymore, I know it's bs to many but in all honesty, I've never had much appetite for success. Things I really want can't be bought, like a good win with a team, teamwork itself, when a plan does come through, when my parents are proud of me, not because of my grades or the amount of money I make or the gifts I buy for them but for who I truly am. The intangibles.

Money is the root of all evil, with men, money comes power, and to see how men have changed when given power, I've seen it all, I am not that confident I still can be that very man I want to be when given power. I guess that's why the fortune tellers said that I need to get a wife, before I will be able to enjoy and keep my wealth.

That said, I wouldn't not welcome the spare cash,  contract ends in June, I hope to be a Deutsche Bank staff till the end of the year, best till March 2015.

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