As i was admiring my 65" OLED TV from my full calf leather sofa and about to watch my darling So-Hyun, Patrick called.
We were going on about his bae, his trip, the traffic and then a voice call came and he got cut off.
"Caron Lim" is calling, i sense something ominous going on. She rarely calls, not at this hour.
10mins and 12 seconds was the duration, felt like 12 seconds, I couldn't comprehend why it was 10mins, certainly didn't felt like it.
Prior to this call, she asked if I'd wanna move from my current position to help Aileen at UBS front office, I flatly turn her down and she told me to offer her a price, I did and at 40% of my current drawn and I told her it's crazy money for someone like me who has no education and no relevant experience.
So today she called and told me that Aileen's been bugging her about why am I not responding, Caron told her to give me figures so that I can or rather hahhaha she can help me take a look if it's worthy of my time.
Current: 88k / annum
UBS: 116k / annum
Diff: 28k / annum
In 10 years that's 280k ... that's S$280,000.00, that's 1/2 my mortgage gone and that's excluding the progression I may get.
But here's what S$28,000 a year gonna cost me
1. Addtional S$2,000 in taxes
2. No more Unison League, no mobile phones during office hours. I need to be alert during the 9hrs fully so I need proper rest day in day out.
3. No more lunches out, probably max once a week.
4. No toilet breaks as and when I want
5. No public holidays (depending on markets I support)
6. Lots of yelling and screaming because it's on the trading floor.
7. Lots of stress because I've never been in front office
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.
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It may come as a no brainer to many, there's only 1 decision, go for it but I just... Caron knew me all too well, she knew I was too comfortable, she knew I was slowing down and I'm no longer motivated. She isn't wrong, I'm slowing down massively in many aspects of life, my brain is no longer processing as quickly as it used to be . . .
I needed to think, I needed time, I needed space, I needed support . .
So i thought i should sort of prep the guild in case i had to leave and Jose (18yrs old) said this
"I mean would the raise be worth it if you have to stop doing what you like? I'm not saying to not take the raise because an opportunity like that is something that doesn't happen every day!"
Wow, he just one shot right through me, like a Hikari proc Starburst ~ totally hit the spot... this is the guy that get panic attack in school, probably gets his fair share of being bullied when he's much younger and has currently still needs to go thru regular therapy.
One beauty of the internet probably got saved my life, brought me closer to people who I truly click and understand. I really hate it here, i use the word hate because everyone is literate, has proper education yet they lack empathy, moral values and humility...
Back to the problem, while it is truly a good problem to have for many people, it is not a problem I ever want to have. At 20 yrs old, all I wanted was to earn a respectable S$5,000 a month by 35 and I will be satisfied. I got this when I turn 27 years old and then I stop chasing after wealth and fame yet this "offer" has truly caught me off-guard.
Truth to be told . . . I'm wavering . . .
What's worst the astrological forecast for the year encourages me to move and it is the best year to switch my job and I will breeze through them. This scenario was not what I had in mind
But...
Do the gods know what truly makes me happy? Or do they think what makes the majority happy would also make me happy...
One man's meat maybe another man's poison... I let out a chuckle, soft shell crab like my fav, but imagine if Lawrence had it LOL
As things stand, i'm
I need to flip a coin . . .
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